Obama vs. McCain and the Media Biases

The End of Journalism
Sometime in 2008, journalism as we knew it died, and advocacy media took its place.

By Victor Davis Hanson

There have always been media biases and prejudices. Everyone knew that Walter Cronkite, from his gilded throne at CBS news, helped to alter the course of the Vietnam War, when, in the post-Tet depression, he prematurely declared the war unwinnible. Dan Rather’s career imploded when he knowingly promulgated a forged document that impugned the service record of George W. Bush. We’ve known for a long time — from various polling, and records of political donations of journalists themselves, as well as surveys of public perceptions — that the vast majority of journalists identify themselves as Democratic, and liberal in particular.

Yet we have never quite seen anything like the current media infatuation with Barack Obama, and its collective desire not to raise key issues of concern to the American people. Here were four areas of national interest that were largely ignored.

CAMPAIGN FINANCING
For years an axiom of the liberal establishment was the need for public campaign financing — and the corrosive role of private money in poisoning the election process. The most prominent Republican who crossed party lines to ensure the passage of national public campaign financing was John McCain — a maverick stance that cost him dearly among conservatives who resented bitterly federal interference in political expression.

In contrast, Barack Obama, remember, promised that he would accept both public funding and the limitations that went along with it, and would “aggressively pursue an agreement with the Republican nominee to preserve a publicly financed general election.” Then in June 2008, Obama abruptly reneged, bowing out entirely from government financing, the first presidential nominee in the general election to do that since the system was created in 1976.

Obama has now raised over $600 million, by far the largest campaign chest in American political history. In many states he enjoys a four-to-one advantage in campaign funding — most telling in his scheduled eleventh-hour, 30-minute specials that will not be answered by the publicly financed and poorer McCain campaign.

The story that the media chose to ignore was not merely the Obama about-face on public financing, or even the enormous amounts of money that he has raised — some of it under dubious circumstances involving foreign donors, prepaid credit cards, and false names. Instead, they were absolutely quiet about a historic end to liberal support for public financing.

For all practical purposes, public financing of the presidential general election is now dead. No Republican will ever agree to it again. No Democrat can ever again dare to defend a system destroyed by Obama. All future worries about the dangers of big money and big politics will fall on deaf ears.

Surely, there will come a time when the Democratic Party, whether for ethical or practical reasons, will sorely regret dismantling the very safeguards that for over three decades it had insisted were critical for the survival of the republic.

Imagine the reaction of the New York Times or the Washington Post had John McCain renounced his promise to participate in public campaign financing, proceeded instead to amass $600 million and outraise the publicly financed Barack Obama four-to-one, and begun airing special 30-minute unanswered infomercials during the last week of the campaign.

THE VP CANDIDATES
We know now almost all the details of Sarah Palin’s pregnancies, whether the trooper who tasered her nephew went to stun or half stun, the cost of her clothes, and her personal expenses — indeed, almost everything except how a mother of so many children gets elected councilwoman, mayor, and governor, routs an entrenched old-boy cadre, while maintaining near record levels of public support.

Yet the American public knows almost nothing of what it should about the extraordinary career of Joe Biden, the 36-year veteran of the Senate. In unprecedented fashion, Biden has simply avoided the press for most of the last two months, confident that the media instead would deconstruct almost every word of “good looking” Sarah Palin’s numerous interviews with mostly hostile interrogators.

By accepted standards of behavior, Biden has sadly proven wanting. He has committed almost every classical sin of character — plagiarism, false biography, racial insensitivity, and serial fabrication. And because of media silence, we don’t know whether he was kidding when he said America would not need to burn coal, or that Hezbollah was out of Lebanon, or that FDR addressed the nation on television as president in 1929 (surely a record for historical fictions in a single thought), or that the public would turn sour on Obama once he was challenged by our enemies abroad. In response, the media reported that the very public Sarah Palin was avoiding the press while the very private Joe Biden shunned interviews and was chained to the teleprompter.

For two months now, the media reaction to Biden’s inanity has been simply “that’s just ol’ Joe, now let’s turn to Palin,” who, in the space of two months, has been reduced from a popular successful governor to a backwoods creationist, who will ban books and champion white secessionist causes. The respective coverage of the two candidates is ironic in a variety of ways, but in one especially — almost every charge against Palin (that she is under wraps, untruthful, and inept) was applicable only to Biden.

So we are about to elect a vice president about whom we know only that he has been around a long time, but little else — and nothing at all why exactly Joe Biden says the most astounding and often lunatic things.

Imagine the reaction of Newsweek or Time had moose-hunting mom Sarah Palin claimed FDR went on television to address the nation as President in 1929, or warned America that our enemies abroad would test John McCain and that his response would result in a radical loss of his popularity at home.

THE PAST AS PRESENT
In 2004, few Americans knew Barack Obama. In 2008, they may elect him. Surely his past was of more interest than his present serial denials of it. Whatever the media’s feelings about the current Barack Obama, there should have been some story that the Obama of 2008 is radically different from the Obama who was largely consistent and predictable for the prior 30 years.

Each Obama metamorphosis in itself might be attributed to the normal evolution to the middle, as a candidate shifts from the primary to the general election. But in the case of Obama, we witnessed not a shift, but a complete transformation to an entirely new persona — in almost every imaginable sense of the word. Name an issue — FISA, NAFTA, guns, abortion, capital punishment, coal, nuclear power, drilling, Iran, Jerusalem, the surge — and Obama’s position today is not that of just a year ago.

Until 2005, Obama was in communication with Bill Ayers by e-mail and phone, despite Ayers reprehensible braggadocio in 2001 that he remained an unrepentant terrorist. Rev. Wright was an invaluable spiritual advisor — until spring of 2008. Father Pfleger was praised as an intimate friend in 2004 — and vanished off the radar in 2008. The media might have asked not just why these rather dubious figures were once so close to, and then so distant from, Obama; but why were there so many people like Rashid Khalidi and Tony Rezko in Obama’s past in the first place?

Behind the Olympian calm of Obama, there was always a rather disturbing record of extra-electoral politics completely ignored by the media. If one were disturbed by the present shenanigans of ACORN or the bizarre national call for Americans simply to skip work on election day to help elect Obama (who would pay for that?), one would only have to remember that in 1996 Obama took the extraordinary step of suing to eliminate all his primary rivals by challenging their petition signatures of mostly African-American voters.

In 2004, there was an even more remarkable chain of events in which the sealed divorce records of both his principle primary rival Blair Hull and general election foe, Jack Ryan, were mysteriously leaked, effectively ensuring Obama a Senate seat without serious opposition. These were not artifacts of a typical political career, but extraordinary events in themselves that might well have shed light on present campaign tactics — and yet largely remain unknown to the American people.

Imagine the reaction of CNN or NBC had John McCain’s pastor and spiritual advisor of 20 years been revealed as a white supremacist who damned a multiracial United States, or had he been a close acquaintance until 2005 of an unrepentant terrorist bomber of abortion clinics, or had McCain himself sued to eliminate congressional opponents by challenging the validity of African-American voters who signed petitions, or had both his primary and general election senatorial rivals imploded once their sealed divorce records were mysteriously leaked.

SOCIALISM?
The eleventh-hour McCain allegations of Obama’s advocacy for a share-the-wealth socialism were generally ignored by the media, or if covered, written off as neo-McCarthyism. But there were two legitimate, but again neglected, issues.

The first was the nature of the Obama tax plan. The problem was not merely upping the income tax rates on those who made $250,000 (or was it $200,000, or was it $150,000, or both, or none?), but its aggregate effect in combination with lifting the FICA ceilings on high incomes on top of existing Medicare contributions and often high state income taxes.

In other words, Americans who live in high-tax, expensive states like a New York or California could in theory face collective confiscatory tax rates of 65 percent or so on much of their income. And, depending on the nature of Obama’s proposed tax exemptions, on the other end of the spectrum we might well see almost half the nation’s wage earners pay no federal income tax at all.

Questions arise, but were again not explored: How wise is it to exempt one out of every two income earners from any worry over how the nation gathers its federal income tax revenue? And when credits are added to the plan, are we now essentially not cutting or raising taxes, but simply diverting wealth from those who pay into the system to those who do not?

A practical effect of socialism is often defined as curbing productive incentives by ensuring the poorer need not endanger their exemptions and credits by seeking greater income; and discouraging the wealthy from seeking greater income, given that nearly two-thirds of additional wealth would be lost to taxes. Surely that discussion might have been of interest to the American people.

Second, the real story was not John McCain’s characterization of such plans, but both inadvertent, and serial descriptions of them, past and present, by Barack Obama himself. “Spreading the wealth around” gains currency when collated to past interviews in which Obama talked at length about, and in regret at, judicial impracticalities in accomplishing his own desire to redistribute income. “Tragedy” is frequent in the Obama vocabulary, but largely confined to two contexts: the tragic history of the United States (e.g., deemed analogous to that of Nazi Germany during World War II), and the tragic unwillingness or inability to use judicial means to correct economic inequality in non-democratic fashion.

In this regard, remember Obama’s revealing comment that he was interested only in “fairness” in increasing capital-gains taxes, despite the bothersome fact that past moderate reductions in rates had, in fact, brought in greater revenue to government. Again, fossilized ideology trumps empiricism.

Imagine the reaction of NPR and PBS had John McCain advocated something like abolishing all capital gains taxes, or repealing incomes taxes in favor of a national retail sales tax.

The media has succeeded in shielding Barack Obama from journalistic scrutiny. It thereby irrevocably destroyed its own reputation and forfeited the trust that generations of others had so carefully acquired. And it will never again be trusted to offer candid and nonpartisan coverage of presidential candidates.

Worse still, the suicide of both print and electronic journalism has ensured that, should Barack Obama be elected president, the public will only then learn what they should have known far earlier about their commander-in-chief — but in circumstances and from sources they may well regret.

— NRO contributor Victor Davis Hanson is a senior fellow at the Hoover Institution.

Ignorance can be bliss, if Unannounced!

I recently listened to an artist who was talking to a group of Music Executives. He was obviously trying to sell his band to the professionals that stood before him by candidly announcing “We are ready to take our career to the next level, however, we know NOTHING about the music industry!” I cringed immediately. He should have saved his breath and just stamped “take advantage of me and my band” on his forehead.

So many bands make the mistake of letting their ignorance show to the WRONG people. Now, don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with being honest. Honesty is appreciated when you are speaking to your manager, friends and parents; but not to lawyers and record execs who have absolutely no loyalty to you, especially when they have only one concern and one concern only – How to make money off of you!

Everyone is so quick to say how the “Record Labels are destroying the Music Industry” but that isn’t quite true. The Majors (and many Independents) couldn’t ink the ridiculous deals they create if bands refused to sign them! It’s simple supply and demand. Bands CHOOSE to ignore that the Music Business is a Business and once they are locked into a deal that takes them for all that they are worth, they begin to complain about the unfairness of their label. Granted, some labels have issues with not delivering and/or meeting certain financial obligations after the execution of a deal, however, the MAJORITY of issues come from the fine print in the original contract in which the band didn’t take time to research.

Folks, IT’S NOT the job of the industry to educate YOU in its business; It’s YOUR job to educate YOU as well as perfecting your craft. If you only learn one thing from me ever, I want you to learn this:

It’s better to educate yourself and seek a QUALIFIED manager than to seek a LABEL on your own, to sign you!

Think about this for a moment. The job of the manager is to further your career to the best of their ability because you are their investment. They are going to work extremely hard in order to reach the highest possible level. They know that their blood, sweat and tears is worth the fight because they believe in you! Therefore, they care about your performance, your physical and emotional health, the toll of the road, right down to your personal life and balance as a whole. They have loyalty to you and become part of your band family. They take the heat and stand up for what is in your best interest without ever missing a beat. They consistently place themselves under the tremendous stresses of the industry while maintaining the role of “parental figure” for the band. Managers are truly the backbone to your establishment. (Pretty impressive, huh?)

Now, do you really think the record label is going to care about you in the same way? The record label ONLY cares about one thing and that is: How many records can you sell? The minute your band stops selling records, they shelf you. They do not care about the band behind the music and/or you as a person. There is no loyalty and most of the time, they will require you to fire your manager (and use theirs) upon signing the deal. Sadly, in many cases, this is when the band slowly starts their downward decline. Why? It’s because the label will approach the band FIRST, if possible. They will send out an A&R rep (close to the age of the band) and promise “the world”. Their job is to excite you on the hype, not the details. Once you are wrapped up in the glam, the contract comes out. When your manager states that “this contract isn’t really in your best interest”, the A&R rep is quick to let the band know that the manager is “holding you back from the dream!” The next thing you know, the one person who cared the most is left behind, bitter and with reason. When that happens, I blame the manager. I blame the manager because many times, it’s a direct result of the manager working harder than the band and allowing them to be spoiled without proper discipline and respect. (Other times, it’s because the band has the brain of a small cabbage and deserves the fate to come:) )

Either way, the bottom line is this: Knowledge is power and in the Music Industry, you can never have enough! As a musician, you MUST remember that success is NOT just about sheer talent. It’s about having the total package (talent, balance, style, attitude, commercial appeal etc.) combined with a qualified management team that will get you to your goal. Always remember where you came from, keep your head level and trust in those you work with. As the ole phrase goes – be careful who you step on on the way up, because they will be the people you pass on the way back down.

Oh and before I forget – If you are ever in the position to “pitch your band”, let your manager do the talking because you probably do not possess the type of information the Execs are looking for. No one expects you to know everything (ie: differences between a P&D and the 360 deal etc.) but announcing that you don’t, isn’t helpful in negotiation. Just save it until you are alone with your manager. Until then, just smile and nod while s/he does the talking and remember that ignorance CAN be bliss, if unannounced!

Speaking Engagements

For Speaking Engagements, Panels, Seminars and other Appearances for Corie Anziano, Please send inquiries to canziano@gmail.com with Booking in the subject line.

Thank You.

Take Cover! ~ Original Music vs. Cover Bands

Not too long ago, a friend of mine asked me to come out and see her brother’s band perform. She told me about the incredible draw they have on a regular basis and how they can barely keep up with the demand for booking. I was quite impressed. She told me that they were making a thousand bucks minimum every weekend at the door. The information she was providing me certainly peaked my interest. When I asked her what type of music they play and she refused to answer. She stated that she wanted their music and performance to speak for itself and that once I saw them live and the crowd, I would be ready to get them a record deal. Now, normally, I ask many more questions, however, she was a friend and I decided to go for that reason.

As I got ready to go to the show, I kept wondering how this band could be doing so well and not be discovered by a label already. Was the label’s becoming this lazy? I mean, Atlanta has heavy A&R Representation and it’s not like this band was THAT far outside of the city. Anyways, I meet her at a venue that I am not familiar with. As we sit down, I see her brother’s band setting up as if they were going to start playing in the opening slot. I turned to my friend and asked “Why are they the openers?”. She laughed and told me that they are the “House Band” on weekends and that the crowd would be coming in a few hours. It then occurred to me. This band wasn’t going to be playing original music, they were going to play covers. I prayed I was wrong but when they took the stage I heard the familiar strum of Welcome to the Jungle. UGH! I couldn’t believe I was wasting my Friday Night. After two songs, I told my friend that I had to leave. She looked at me confused and pleaded with me to stay. She then said the one line that so many other’s have told me before – “They NEED a record deal, they sing BETTER than the ORIGINAL bands that sing these songs! Please, if A&R sees them, they will WANT them, I am TELLING YOU!” Spoken like a true fan, but yet, so misguided.

Let me explain something to you folks. A&R WILL NOT sign YOUR band if you do covers. PERIOD! Why? Because they signed the band’s who sang those songs ALREADY! No matter how well you cover songs, your music will not equate into record sales. You will NOT have a platinum album and become famous with screaming fans, you will not be making money since you will be PAYING to cover each song since the licensing is held by the original band and THIRD – No One Cares! The only place you will get gigs at is wedding receptions, local bars and community parties. Don’t believe me? Tell me what band became FAMOUS and SOLD Millions of Records with a Mixed Karaoke CD? Go ahead, I’ll wait. EXACTLY. NO ONE!

Now, let’s not confuse a “cover band” with a “tribute band”. Some tribute bands do make considerable money and go out on tour but they only use material that “that original band” did; and yes, most of the times, they sound even better. These acts are HARD to come by because you MUST be incredible. Do you receive a major record deal as a tribute band though? No! The only way to become the Rock Star you have always dreamed of being, is to do original music. You must put something out there that draws fans and makes them yours. Band that do covers are only drawing a crowd that likes to listen to songs they know and can sing along with while drinking their beer.

If you can’t write music and/or lyrics, hire a songwriter. If you do not know any, contact ASCAP, BMI and/or SESAC. You can buy and/or license songs for your band. Depending on the author, prices can vary; however, if your band is truly talented, it is worth the investment. I know this information is going to make some bands angry and they will STILL BELIEVE that their rendition of “Insert Famous Song Title Here” is their ticket to the big leagues and that’s fine. You can live out your dream in your local bars with screaming locals as long as you know that the only distribution deal to sign is going to be from the beer distributors for the bar.

How to Get Your Band Signed without Getting Screwed

I had a very interesting conversation today with a CEO of a company that focuses on Digital Distribution and Music Management. He asked me “What do you think an Artist wants in a Record Label? And how do you not “turn them off” when you tell them the realities of the Industry?” I started to laugh. I have been asked this question more times than I know and yet, it still doesn’t get old. I answered without hesitation, “They want Fame and they want it NOW! When you tell them that it doesn’t work that way, they will ask someone else until they get the answer that they WANT to hear. However, once they live the truth, they ultimately come back with those famous words “You were right”.”

Artists are brainwashed into believing that “getting signed” is synonymous with being “rich and successful” and that it can literally “fall into your lap” by emailing and submitting to A&R reps all day long. (You just gotta find one to say yes, right??) I contribute this popular delusion to when million dollar record deals were inked and stories of the “rags to riches” artist were broadcasted across the country on MTV. Those days are long gone and are never coming back.

Nowadays, to get signed, an artist must go back to the grass-roots of earning fans. (You know, how it was ALWAYS done prior MTV.) The problem is, many artists are too lazy to do the work necessary and in reality, it’s not as impossible as you may think. The main key of getting a great record deal lies within the hands of the Artist and their Manager. Your band needs to be talented, have excellent guidance and enough clout (and following) to negotiate successfully. Getting to that point is the main challenge however, if you can get into the position where the label wants to work for you and not the other way around, your band will be golden. I am going to give you the best lesson ever; it’s called “Corie’s 101: How to Get Your Band Signed without Getting Screwed!”

STEP ONE: Make sure your band doesn’t suck. Seriously! This is the most important step and if you are wrong, none of the rest will matter. Sucking = Bad.

STEP TWO: Buy a van or a gutted school bus that can hold your band as well as a decent trailer that can haul your gear. Treat it well because you just purchased your new home -Congratulations!!!

STEP THREE: Book shows in every dive that you can find. (Five shows per week for six weeks is ideal for starters.) Keep the shows within 3 to 5 hours of each other, city to city. Ask for gas money (typically $150-$200 bucks a show) and if you’re lucky, they may throw you a pizza! Do not ask to play for beer -Your van will not run on beer and neither will you! The talent Buyers will take you much more seriously when they see that you consider touring a job and not a “rolling bachelor party”.

STEP FOUR: Ramen Noodles are the food of Rock Stars! Stock Up and learn to eat them crunchy! It builds character and fits into your budget! Do not stop at Mc Donald’s and Burger King for food, you will go broke. Stop at a grocery store and remember – you need to eat to live, not live to eat!

STEP FIVE: Play for 5 people the way you would play for 5,000. NEVER underestimate a SINGLE fan! Perform as if this show decides your fate and in reality, it does! If you play like you’re disappointed, the audience will pick up on that quickly. You MUST win the crowd! Take pictures with them and tell them that you are going to post the pictures on your website. Tell them where they can find you and how much you appreciate their support so they will come back the next time you come through.

STEP SIX: You have returned home and it is six weeks later. You are still broke however; you have met hundreds of new people across the map. Now, there is only one thing to do…REPEAT STEPS 3-5! (Isn’t this FUN???) It’s time to go back out and hit the same clubs and/or vicinities. Email and/or call those lovely people you met and let them know you’re headed their way because you haven’t seen them in over a month! Have them tell their friends and bring them out! If you didn’t overestimate Step #1, then more people will be at these shows this go-around.

After repeating Steps 3-6 three or four times, you should be able to branch out to nearby cities that are new but close enough for your new found fan base to come see you along the route! (Oh look – You have a following!!) Yes Yes, I know – you are super skinny from the “Ramen Noodles and Water Diet”, but chicks dig that! Once you are drawing some screaming fans, the girls will be offering the band to sleep and shower at their homes instead of using the Truck Stops! (Wow, you are slowly becoming a Rock Star!) Before you know it, you will no longer be the opening band, but the Headliner! You will be paid more and drawing a fan base that is loyal as well as NOTICEABLE!

Once you have hit this point, the A&R guys have heard about you and are sitting somewhere in the audience. If your pull is strong enough, (which is determined from how well you did steps 1-6), your manager will be in a position to get you the record deal you deserve and more. Maintaining the upper hand is critical; bands that do not, get quickly shelved after being signed! (Not sure what that means? Well, I will cover that next month.) Until then – Go shopping for your new home and let me know when you will be on the road. If you come to Atlanta, come see me! (I will even let you eat my stock of ramen noodles and save you a few bucks!) Just remember – being a Rock Star is work! If you aren’t willing to invest the time, no one else will either. So evaluate what you want and if being a musician is it, then get ready because the road is the only path to stardom.

A Message from Kid Rock on Downloading Music!

What You need to know about Music Conferences & Festivals

Ahhh – Summer. I love the summer. It’s the marking of multiple Music Conferences, Festivals and other Events nationwide; which also means – “A Time for Opportunity!” Whenever I hear about an artist who needs a record label, a tour and/or even networking prospects…now is the time! Being the Executive Panelist Coordinator for the Atlantis Music Conference & Festival, I get asked a multitude of questions and I figured I would cover what a “Music Conference” is and how it can benefit you!

First off, once an artist averages more hours a week practicing than socializing they should consider investing into a Music Conference. These Conferences should be for (in this order) Education, Networking and Shared Experience. Now, many conferences boast about the opportunities to be “discovered” and “signed” but what does this mean? In reality, is it enough alone to justify the investment? Let’s break it down.

The discovery aspects are most likely not going to happen until you have a team in place that has connections strong enough to get the music industry to your show. If your ONLY motivation is to go play at a conference in the hopes an A&R HAPPENS upon your show and signs you, that’s not a wise investment, more of a gamble on a penny stock; meaning, never say never, it HAS happened, but the odds are not in your favor.

However, at Atlantis, if you feel you are ready for that record label deal and you DO NOT have a team in place; Atlantis can provide the platform for you through the “Music Industry Face-off”. It’s where your band is guaranteed a spot to perform directly in front of an A&R panel and the Majors in your genre. You receive immediate feedback on the spot and YES, we have had record contracts inked for those who were undeniably talented. (That happened again this past September 2007!) Please note: The Music Industry Face-Off is NOT part of the normal registration. Therefore, if you are looking for this type of opportunity and plan on coming to Atlantis, make sure you register for the Music Face-Off instead of the regular submission in advance especially since spots are limited and there is a deadline. Also, not ALL conferences offer this type of opportunity. Make sure you ask the conference you are attending if they do and the qualifications of the panel.

Now, let’s say you ARE accepted to perform out of the thousands who submit, whether it’s Atlantis and/or your Regional/Local Event. The biggest mistake I see our artists make is showing up to the venue, playing their show and leaving immediately afterwards and not taking advantage of attending any of the 4 days of education, networking and experience at their fingertips. Many Music Conferences have panels that are an incredible resource! Some of the topics covered are Songwriting, Producing, A&R, Touring, Promotion, Distribution, Legal, Management, Marketing, Recording, Building your Career through the Internet, DIY and Major Label options! The panelists are the Cream of the Crop, the Top Industry Professionals that you may never have a chance to reach and/or connect with at any other given point.

Now, some conferences only focus on getting a “major label deal” which isn’t always helpful. I truly believe that a conference needs to provide much more than that. At Atlantis, our unwavering mission statement for 11 years has been to service the artists through education, dedicated feedback and to service the industry by providing the greatest platform of discovery for new talent Worldwide through our showcases in all genres. We do not have an opinion of Indie vs. Major vs. DIY, our role is provide knowledge about all the above so that our artists can make the best educated decision as it relates to their goals.

Even with all of the benefits of a conference for an aspiring musician, the number one question is “How much is this going to cost us?” I took the time to total up the average 4 person band below as if you were coming to perform at Atlantis. (Keep in mind, gas prices vary area to area, but I based it on Atlanta, Georgia gas prices because my mother didn’t answer the phone when I called to ask her the average gas rate is in UpState, NY currently, so blame her if it’s off a quarter or three!)

Out of Town Artist

$35.00 – Submission Fee, if submitted on time.
$129.00 – One Bedroom Suite at the Granada if booked by August 30^th, 2008
$12.00 – Parking overnight at the Granada
$240.00 – Van Rental, 2 days @ $120 a day, unlimited mileage
$126.00 – Gas, average trip 540 miles @ $3.50/gallon at 15 miles a gallon for a 12/15 pass van.
$240.00 – Food – 2 days, two/three meals a day, $30/person a day, 4 members per group

$782.00

This equates to approximately $195.50 per band member! Stick $47.00 aside each week for a month and you are there! (I have seen bands spend more on cigarettes and beer.)

Now, is it better to attend multiple conferences or try to develop a “buzz” at a single event? In other words, should artists be spending travel money to reach the executives or should they wait for them to come to their local/regional event? It is best if you can afford it, to attend MULTIPLE conferences. NEVER wait for the industry to come to YOU! Go to where they are all congregated in ONE place. Every conference is different. Make sure you do your homework. If you are a Rock band and the Music Conference only specializes in Country with Top Country Pros, you are wasting your time. Look for the event that provides you the most for what you do and specialize in. Also, make sure the panelists you are going to see are qualified to be speaking. I have attended events where the so-called “pros” are nothing but local, self-proclaimed industry that couldn’t get you a deal even if their life depended on it.

At the Atlantis Music Conference our panelists have consisted of Steve Schnur (Worldwide Executive of EA Games), Dallas Austin (Super Producer), Matt Serletic (CEO of Virgin Records), Steve Gottlieb (President of TVT Records), Mathew Knowles (President of Music World), Three Doors Down, Shinedown, Teddy Riley, India.Arie, Jermaine Dupri (Executive Vice President of Urban Music at Virgin Records) and many, many more. We also have showcased artists such as Mastodon, Queens of the Stone Age, Maroon 5, Los Lonely Boys, John Mayer, Cee-Lo, Bone Crusher, Cartel, Tony Rich, Keri Hilson, Bryan Michael Cox, Goodie Mob, Lost Prophets, The Lost Trailers, Sugarland, The Wright’s, Trapt, Bowling for Soup and Kottonmouth Kings and last year more than 100 Sonicbids artists played at Atlantis!

Even if you submit and you are rejected to perform, you NEED to attend more than anyone else. At the Atlantis Music Conference, any artist who submits a package and is rejected receives one complimentary registration good for the entire conference. We do this for a reason. It’s so you can learn exactly what piece of the puzzle you are missing that stands between you and the career you are looking to further. So make sure you ask the conference(s) you plan on attending if they will still allow you in. If they do, take FULL advantage for the information provided so you can build your career in the right direction.

Bottom line – Depending on where you are in your career and what your goals are for tomorrow, there are opportunities all around you unlike many years before where you had to “know someone who knew someone”. I am biased and will tell you everyone should go to a music conference every year, especially Atlantis! However, it really depends on your needs and personal choice. If you are ready to advance past the local bar gigs but aren’t sure how, then you need to attend. Even if you aren’t an artist, conferences are a necessity for networking between booking agents, managers, radio, legal, sponsorship financiers and many other crucial members of the musical team! So what are you waiting for? Get off your rear and get in gear! Opportunity is knocking and you need to be there and if you decide that the Atlantis Music Conference is your destination, I will see you there! Make sure to say Hello!

To learn more about the Atlantis Music Conference visit us at www.atlantismusic.com or call (770) 499-8600. The 11^th Annual Atlantis Conference is slated for September 17-20^th, 2008 in the Heart of Atlanta, Georgia. In 2007, Over 32,000 people attended from 11 different countries! If you are looking for a career in any aspect of Music (including Music Education) then you need to be here!

Holy Grail or Rail

Every band seems to be on a quest; a quest for that Holy Grail called the “Record Label”. Now, I have learned throughout the years that when a band says “I hate labels and I’d tell them where to stick it”…isn’t EXACTLY True. In my findings, the second an A&R Rep says “I want your band”, they quickly pipe up and say “Really? Where do I sign?” Obviously what the band MEANT to say is they would tell the label where to stick it on the table so they can press hard for three copies! It’s not the fact they were lying when they would speak their opposition; it’s the fact that the Industry has brainwashed musicians into believing that “without them, you can’t make it”.

Let me tell you a story.

Picture it – Atlanta, 1989. A band formed. A band that would later be considered one of the key creations in a genre called “rap-metal”; a band called – Stuck Mojo. Before Rage Against the Machine, before Linkin Park, before anyone – they played with a unique sound derived by having members from very diversified musical backgrounds. They worked diligently recording demos while they lived in their 20×20 recording space that consisted of no running water and cold concrete flooring. They would take showers using a hose that the landlord supplied while calling a public restroom at a convenience store their own. Without much money, they hit the road. For four years, they played every dive and hole that would have them across America. Slowly, they built a fan base that became an underground following that couldn’t be denied. They gained the attention of Century Media and signed with them in 1995. Sadly, Stuck Mojo inked a SEVEN Album deal that also signed away all rights, publishing and merchandise with it! The band didn’t know better but what did they have to lose? They were living “in a van down by the river” theoretically! At the time, Century Media was a green-independent that later would become a Major in Europe as a result but the band on the other hand, wouldn’t be as lucky.

Without further ado, Mojo set out and toured like a MACHINE and when I say toured, let me give you an idea of what “touring” meant to them. At their record highest, Stuck Mojo played 318 days in 1998. From 1995 thru 1999 they averaged 250+ gigs a year, literally living on the road and only coming off to record. Sounds incredible, huh? Think Again.

Stuck Mojo toured the world 20+ times having their basic expenses paid without having to get a “real” job. However, they sold hundreds of thousands of records only to end up owning nothing after a decade of hard work. 100% of all seven albums sales as well as publishing would (and will) forever go to Century Media and never a penny to them. Reality is brutal, they lived a dream that left them with nothing in the end. As a result, In 2001, they fulfilled the lingering contractual obligations and prevented Century Media from being able to exercise any ownership rights over future recorded materials and then the band fractured.

Does this happen often? Sadly, Yes. Let me give you a more precise picture – When you sign a record deal, you see very little money (if any), all of which you have to pay back out of your 12% to 18% royalty depending on how good a negotiator you are. If you get a $40,000 recording advance and a “good” royalty deal, you will be making on paper close to $2 a record; meaning you have to sell 20,000 records just to repay the recording advance. Meanwhile, the label has not only recouped the money they advanced you but also netted close to $5 a record to boot; therefore making their $40,000 back from you AND $100,000 while you receive nothing more financially. (And we haven’t even gotten to the promotional monies they put out to promote you which all has to be recouped.) Times this by years of interest, bills, no rights to your songs, no merchandise rights or publishing and you have the recipe for disaster that Stuck Mojo endured longer than most. (Most would have never have fulfilled the obscene contract and found real jobs in a different field.) But, this story actually has a happy ending!

In early 2005, Stuck Mojo decided they weren’t done and regrouped! Without a label, they decided to do things much differently. They returned to the one thing that made them famous…Touring! With a new album in hand and a strong team in place, they released the album free for download on the internet. Each recorded track had Rich Ward (the guitarist), doing an intro that said “This is Rich Ward from Stuck Mojo and you are listening to (insert song name here). This was done for a reason. Anyone who downloaded the track and passed it to friends not only had the song ingrained in their heads, but also the band name – over and over and over again for each downloaded track. The result? Larger show attendance and a new fan base to add to the old! They turned a significant profit on live performances and sold their CD/DVD combo for those who wanted a hard copy verses the burned. It was a success! Stuck Mojo made more money off of the Southern Born Killers album than the seven combined previously on Century Media! With newly energized ambition, the band picked up where they left off, but this time on THEIR terms. With having successfully toured the US, Europe and Russia since and gearing up to record their 9th album, the outlook is refreshing! And, believe it or not, Mojo signed to a label recently again, but the difference? Stuck Mojo is the ONLY band on the label that owns 100% of their music, publishing and merchandise and it’s only for two albums. Needless to say, the other bands who signed everything are in for a rude awakening!

So, whenever you hear someone in a band who thinks music is just about talent, think again. The Music Business is very much that…A Business. It has always been my opinion; if you know less than anyone on the business team that represents you, then you are doing yourself a disservice. Learn all you can and not just enough to be dangerous; that’s how you get ripped off! Bottom line? As a musician, never sign off on your music! It’s your livelihood, your life, your meaning! When you think you have nothing to lose and that grail is gleaming, ask yourself one thing- “If I have no value, why are they here to sign me?” Think about it, be smart and know – Sometimes when you think you have nothing to lose, is when you lose EVERYTHING!

STUCK MOJO – March 2008

Blood, Sweat, Tears and No Contract

I get asked many questions about the music industry on a regular basis and it’s not always from just the bands. Many times, it’s from new managers who ask me for a copy of my “management contract” to use as a guide. I automatically get the “deer in headlights” look when I state “I don’t have one.” Let me tell you a story.

Years ago when I was working with local bands, I realized the time had come to spread my wings and take on a new challenge – “breaking a band”. I didn’t have the contacts like I do now, but I had the drive! With my strong background of managerial experience as well as marketing, I wanted nothing more and set sail on my mission.

After months of listening to countless demos and seeing show after show, I started to believe that my perfect group would never emerge. So, on the recommendation of a friend, I flew down to Florida to see a group that he felt was the next BIG thing. When I arrived, I was pleasantly surprised to see that they had a great stage presence and catchy music, however, the first thing that came to mind was “current bands that sounded just like them”. (Which is the industry’s kiss of death.) When they came to me after their show for feedback, I started explaining my thoughts when suddenly, I stopped in mid-sentence. I slowly turned around because there was something I couldn’t ignore. The headlining band was only about 35 seconds into their first song when I found myself transformed into a trance-like state. I slowly walked away from what I was doing, completely glued. Wow! These guys had it all! The look, the sound, the energy! Not only did they have the entire package but over 1800 local cheering fans. DING DING DING, Ladies and Gentleman – We have a Winner! I immediately fought through the sea of local groupies like a kid at Fat Camp hearing the dinner bell. These guys were gonna need someone and that someone was going to be ME!

After approximately a week of meetings, we became a perfect team – well, Almost. The only thing standing in the way of our perfect bliss was their record label. The small label was run by a wealthy man who had deep pockets and no qualifications. He even had a fancy contract binding them for two years and since he financed their CD’s and merch, they felt obligated. They had no booking agent, no management, no distribution, no promotion, no “anything” outside of what they had already done on their own. When I asked what they DID have, they smiled brightly and said “We have 2000+ CD’s and a few really cool T-shirts!” Oh, YAY! Nothing spells success like 100% pure cotton!

Even though my band had been sucked into this bogus deal, I knew they were going to be huge and I wanted it so bad, I could taste it. I immediately started out revamping their press kits and making club contacts. I needed to expose them outside of the Orlando area so I booked them in Atlanta, GA at the Velvet Room @ the Hard Rock. (They had never played outside of their home state previously.) The show went rather well though we didn’t have the draw they were used to in FL; but we made new fans and that was what we needed. I will never forget the lead singer thanking me after that show and stating “You have already done more in a few weeks than our label has done in 14 months!” Talk about an ego boost! Over the next few months, I worked feverishly making multiple industry contacts. I was successful in getting them into rotation on College Airways as well as some of the top radio stations. Within 8 months, I had booked their (and my) first East Coast Tour complete with minimum guarantees of 500+ dollars and all the beer they could drink per show. (I had NO clue at the time that this was almost unheard of in the Industry to achieve with a no-name band.) All I knew was – we were on our way! (Well, one of us was…)

Shortly thereafter, I received a call from MTV. They had heard about my band through mutual contacts and wanted to use one of our songs on the Laguna Beach soundtrack! I was so excited I could barely move. As the tour approached, I was able to lock down 3 other TV and soundtrack deals as well as securing Major Label A&R (Atlantic Records and Universal) to attend our NYC Showcase at CBGB’s. With only 13 more days left under the label’s strong hold, they set out on tour.

The tour started out great! They would call me after each show and tell me how “awesome” of a time they were having but there was a problem. Not only was their pockets growing with a little bit of cash, but so was their heads. Somewhere between night 7-8, they decided they were HUGE Rockstar’s and they became disrespectful to the venue owners. The band began demanding free liquor to be delivered to them backstage and the owner said NO! (Now, I have seen clubs do this but you usually need to draw MORE than 9 people in order for them to oblige.) Out of cockiness, the band retaliated by posting a photo on their website of them flipping off the venue even though the man let them stay to perform and paid them $550.00 for it. Needless to say, the talent buyer called me at 2am stating that he hoped this wasn’t a “reflection of the talent I represented”. OUCH!

My tour slowly became about “damage control” and in order to save my own name, I joined the tour in Philly. I had to remind them constantly that this was a JOB and NOT a vacation. They even would refuse to play shows in order to go “shopping” in select cities. (Yeah, you heard me – Shopping!) By the time the showcase rolled around at CBGB’s, their voices were shot from hollering and raising hell in the City. My lead singer cracked and strained through the first song as my A&R reps listened and cringed. How could they blow this? I worked SO hard and THIS is what they give me? I then went to the bar for some therapeutic alcohol. As I waited for my drink, their sleazy label guy came wandering through the doors at CBGB’s with his wealthy posse and a huge smile. Part of me perked up. I knew their contract had expired at this point and I felt the need to rub it in but he beat me to it. “Corie!” He said, with a huge smile, “I want to thank you for what you have done for my boys!” He then threw a 100 bill on the bar and told the bartender to give me whatever I wanted all night and there was more where that came from! He then told me something that my band had hid from me throughout the tour. My heart sunk right down to my ankles as he told me that the band resigned for another year with him before they left FL. I wanted to cry. How could they? After they were done performing, I questioned the band. Their response was “If we can do THIS good with YOU, imagine how good we can do with a REAL manager!”

That day was the worst day of my life or so I thought. I ended up going back home to West Virginia only to have the biggest awakening ever. My phone rang and it was a pretty heavy hitter in the music industry. He was calling to say that I had caused a huge stir up the East Coast and it wasn’t because of my band. He went on to tell me how impressed he was of my determination and success to get radio airplay, large booking guarantees and MTV contracts without any previous knowledge and that he wanted me to work with him. He then added, “If you can do all of that with a crappy band, imagine how good you’re gonna do with a Great Band!”

I had been so focused on what my band was doing, that I never realized the Industry was watching ME! It was a few days later when Mark Willis, the President of the Recording Academy in the Atlanta Chapter, called to talk to me. He made it clear that it wasn’t the band who wanted it, but it was ME who wanted it MORE than the band. I told him that I wished I would’ve had a contract though and he told me something that I would become my career philosophy. “Any contract can be broken in a court of law. Why hold yourself to a contract working with people that you may not want to work with and vice-versa?” He was right. If I needed to hold my band to a contract, then something was off balance. I then looked at him and asked if he held management contracts with any of his National Bands and he stated “not since my first breaking band told me that they couldn’t wait to have a REAL manager!”

From that day on, I have run Anziano Enterprises on the Honor-System. I work just as hard as my bands – no more, no less! And to tell you the truth, I couldn’t be happier! The only contracts I keep are for booking and label deals but none for management. Everyday I smile for two reasons – (1) Because I know that blood, sweat and tears DOES pay off. (2) The knowledge that my first band never played outside of Florida ever again with their “Real Manager”. (insert evil laugh here)

Bottom line: Whether you are a band, manager, booking agent and/or promoter, you must remember one thing – SOMEONE IS ALWAYS WATCHING. So play like the label guy is in the audience, book as if you have a National and promote like it’s the last show ever! Doing the work will get you noticed faster than talking about it and you never know – You just might find yourself at the top before you know it!

Corie L. Anziano

FIGHTING THE DIGITAL ADDICTION OF TODAY’S TEEN

With so many digital outlets nowadays, many parents feel they cannot control what their teens are seeing and/or doing.
From explicit Myspace profiles littered with sexual innuendos, photos of scantily dressed girls who upload them themselves to constant texting and IM’s all hours of the day and night. With these digital outlets constantly at the finger tips of our youth, it can drive a parent completely nuts! Being in a Digital Era is fascinating for businesses but a DANGER to our youth. There are many things a parent can do, but parents need to take affirmative action verses being passive.

“Texting is the same as us passing notes back in the day…who cares?”

If you believe this, you are contributing to the problem. When we passed notes, it took time, especially if you wanted the same one to go to three or four different people. We didn’t have the luxury of email with a “CC Line” option therefore you would have to copy it multiple times and deliver it personally to the people you needed it to go to. Though time consuming, the art of letter writing allowed us to release anger as each word was inked on loose leaf. As we spouted out our rants, we slowly began to calm down and analyze what was worth the time and what wasn’t. When we got tired of the sore hand, we would take a break and stomp around the house rambling how there would be “hell to pay tomorrow for so and so!” Later, when we became emotionally drained, we’d fall asleep. By morning, things didn’t seem so bad after all and suddenly, the letters seemed a bit too harsh. Once in school and confronted by the person of conflict, we were able to talk and put things into perspective. The next thing you knew, all was right in the world again and we thanked God that we never delivered what was penned in the heat of the moment.

The World of the Digital Teen.

Today, in this Digital Era, our kids are literally living “in the moment”. Time has been replaced by “instantaneous”; lacking “cool-down” and/or “think” periods. Without realizing, teens involuntarily place themselves under the exact scrutiny that many Hollywood Stars wish to vanish from. Armed with cellphones in hand, kids follow each other around waiting for the next action that can be deemed as thrilling and/or scandalous. They then can give play-by-play accounts to peers as things unravel before them in school, therefore there is little to no time for explanation, just reaction. In seconds, everyone knows “who said what about who” and the snowball effect begins. The brutal name calling erupts in encrypted acronym texts fueled by immediate anger. There is no turning back. These messages lack feeling and/or emotion and can be deciphered anyway the mind sees fit. Groups of teens gang up, cheering on the stronger one, while the child at the center is uncertain how the situation escalated to this level. Everything has become about status quo. Instead of focusing on education, many teens are becoming withdrawn and caught up in the stress; leading to increased reports of rage, depression, drug use and consistent illness. While most youth survive, some do not.

What causes a child to fall susceptible to this lifestyle?

Many factors play a part in which children will fall susceptible to this type of dissertation. The teens that are confident, mature and well balanced within their own environment tend not to look to peers for refinement for their existence but rather as a comparison for typical socialization. However, when the child is of the insecure type ie: lacking values and proper regulation of discipline; it becomes a whole new ball game. To figure out which teens risk falling prey to this behavior, we must analysis the background of their youth.
Knowing that a child’s overall stability stems from their upbringing, we can identify these groups quickly. According to universal data, kids who come from the following backgrounds, but not limited to, are targets:

A. Single Parent families and/or Abusive Families (emotional, sexual, physical)
B. Single Child Families
C. Large families (with 4+ biological children).

Many parents will argue strongly that they have taught their children “right from wrong” and they are correct but only in verbal instances. In reality, it’s the fact that “right from wrong” wasn’t implemented properly with consequential and behavioral balances. When a parent teaches a child a “life-lesson”, the adolescent learns through both words and the actions of their parents. For example, if a child is expected to have a perfectly tidy room but yet the rest of the house is in shambles, it becomes a lesson of “do what I say, don’t do as I do”; resulting in the opposite reaction. A lesson must be followed up with consistent actions or the parents message will be lost into teaching manipulation. Another prime example is when a mother tells her child to “stop worrying about what others think and study school work” but yet, minutes later, the mother is on the phone with friends, participating in her own “who did what and to whom” nonsense. Hours later, the mother, still dressed in her pajamas at noon, tied to the phone hanging on every word about her “worth”, speaks louder than “do not participate in gossip.” The child now has the lesson concreted that “people define your existence”.

When a child comes from a larger family (four or more siblings), it is the oldest that usually has the most amount of responsibility because the other siblings are deemed as “too young” or “do not know better”, in their parent’s views. The oldest then tends to act out but so does the youngest. The oldest rebels out of overly strict guidelines of discipline and the youngest rebels because of the lack thereof. The middle children thrive best because of the “checks and balances” in place. Bottom line, Its all about finding an individual identity with social boundaries and moral conduct. Kids yearn for discipline but if it is out of proportion, it will be problematic in the future.

When it comes to the single child family, parents must guard themselves against “only child syndrome”. These children automatically are at a disadvantage when it comes to preadolescence socialization; which poses a different type of difficulty for parents. Instead of having siblings to observe; they observe their parents intensely and at a much younger age. If not careful, the single child will develop manipulative behaviors at an accelerated rate compared to the traditional American family. Parents tend to fall for the “puppy-dog eyes” and the “poor me” persuasions because they themselves feel “bad” for upsetting their “baby”. In return, these parents (as well as grand-parents) over compensate so the child never feels a void. Typically, single child families spend excessively more for monetary rewards. When it comes to discipline, rules are known to be casted in “Jello” and everything revolves around the child’s schedule instead of vice-versa. Slowly, the parent looses control. (Hence the “spoiled-rotten only child” stereotype.) Therefore, parents must have stricter regulations and proper moral values through exemplar behaviors themselves in order to maintain proper parental control.

Hear No Evil, See No Evil.

As the teens develop more into their generation, parents are finding that the struggles of the digital era aren’t as easy as anticipated. Kids no longer have to sneak out of the house to go meet peers to associate with and/or to become involved in illegal matters. They can do so from the comforts of their own bedrooms. Since the advent of social networks such as Myspace and instant messengers like AIM and MSN, kids are constantly in touch with their peers as well as predators. Parent no longer can hear the foul language and/or know who their kids are associating with on a regular basis because its transmitted electronically. With access to camera phones, they can take provocative photos of themselves and send it to whom ever. At any given moment, your child can be in communications with more than 15 people at once and you being none the wiser. Now, not all kids will abuse these services and become unruly, placing themselves into dangerous positions but some will and that is when the parents must chisel clear boundaries.

My child is doing WHAT???

In record numbers, teens are now using digital technologies to cheat on tests, speak to peers and involving themselves in online sexual activities. Parents describe the popularity of these outlets as an addiction and/or obsession for their children and they are correct in literal terms. The key word is actually “over-exposure”. Anything in excess is bad, regardless of what it is. When your child has 24/7 access to social networks, texting, cellphones, instant messengers, camera etc. there is going to be a recipe for disaster. Your child is not just “over-exposed” to these outlets, but “over-exposing” themselves.

Kids will create profiles, listing their date of birth, phone number, multiple photos, AIM Screen Names, home address, name of family members, right down to the school they attend. At any given point, a predator can view their page and go to the child’s school parking lot and pick out the kid without problem. What is even scarier is that your teen doesn’t care. Teens have a faux sense of immortality. They think it can happen to others, but not them. They feel they are smart enough to tell when someone is fake and/or how to recognize the warning signs. Unfortunately, they are wrong.

In studies, even the most well-rounded teens were deceived by fake IM messages. Studies revealed, that when the child’s parent made a fake AIM Screen Name and disguised their typing styles to reflect the acronym abbreviations common in messaging, their teens not only tried to guess who they were speaking to, but also started an in depth conversation with the “Mystery Person”. The only information the parents were armed with was basic names of friends and a few known incidences. From there, their own child guessed multiple people that could be on the other end. After about three guesses, the parent led the child believe they were correct. They then continued in conversations with their teens who were none the wiser. Parent were astonished to know that within minutes their children were divulging information about sexual activity and drug use. Studies showed that on the average, it only took approximately 48 minutes to gain the confidence of the teen. The teen was truly convinced that they “knew” the peer on the other end and even went as far as to agreeing to times and proximities to meet.

How do we control what we cannot see?

Think of this for a moment. When we were kids, if our parents didn’t want us to use our Cassettes (or CD Players) because we were grounded, they took away the walkman and the cd player. If they wanted us off the phone, they took the phone. Now granted, we may not have had the cell phones and the online instant messengers like they do today, but what it boils down to is removing access to just two more items. If your child is texting and/or on the cell phone, you take the phone! If that doesn’t work and they steal it back and/or get another phone for their SIM card- you simply shut off the service! When you go to bed, you remove all land lines except for the one in your room next to your head. If your child is the keen tip-toeing type and still gains access, just replace your cordless phone in your room with a cord phone. PRESTO!

As for the computer…Take the computer out of your child’s room! IF YOU CAN NOT SEE WHAT THEY ARE DOING, THEN MOVE IT. No child or school aged teen should have access to a computer behind closed doors. Not in our time, not ever! If you have a 15 year old daughter, chances are she is having sex, uploading photos of herself to others, talking “big” and arranging times to “hook up” aka meet for sex. Parents must take control and its not as difficult as it seems. Adults need to use common sense. A child using a computer in the same room isn’t enough. You must make the computer screen face you at all times. Have your teen placed with their back to you. If you do not have the time to watch what is going on, then remove them from the device. They are much quicker in minimizing screens than you are. When they are facing you, they have one eye on the screen and the other one watching your movements at all times. Turn the tables and regain control. If your teen is disturbed by your observation, its because they know that their activity is wrong. If you know something is going on with your teen, turn on the logging feature on AIM. This will keep a running dialog of everything they type to peers on the computer’s hard-drive. Reading it isn’t being nosy when there is an obvious problem, its called “being a responsible parent”. Take the time to look at the browser history. Be familiar not only to what they are typing but what they are looking at. Knowing the problem is half the battle. You already know they aren’t going to tell you what they are doing, so research it yourself. It’s better than getting the call from the police at 2am.

As for cell phones, parents must stop feeding into the status quo. Do not purchase a cell phone for your teen with IM, texting and/or camera capabilities. Many phones nowadays are the same as having a pocket computer and it is not a necessity for your child. It is a distraction, PERIOD. Limit their time on the phone as well as purchasing pre-paid basic phones verses the unlimited plans. If your child’s grades are poor and/or they are involved in problematic behaviors, only allow phone time in front of you! If you can’t hear their conversation, then there shall be no conversation.

Tough Love

No child wants to be monitored, this we know, but once your child has blatantly abused every privilege and made these Instant Digital Addictions the sole meaning of their lives, you MUST take control. If you think you can’t then you aren’t doing your due diligence as a parent. Yes, your child will be mad and throw a temper tantrum, it’s the reflection of their current maturity level. It’s almost shocking to see a 16 year old break down into a tantrum that we would expect from a prepubescent. But how can someone be ready for sex, ready to make proper decisions about drugs and drinking when they are slamming doors and spouting out in rages of childish anger? They can’t and they aren’t. If you haven’t set the guidelines before, then expect the wrath of your teen. Whatever you do, you cannot give in three days later or you might as well be giving your child permission to do whatever they want and when they please.

I HAVE set rules before but the problem is reoccurring!!

You will experience the pattern REPEATEDLY if YOU yourself cannot stick to the disciplines YOU set. The teen knows repetition and will see this as a temporary punishment and they just have to wait a few days until your guard is down. In order to stop patterns effectively you MUST start by setting the RULES and STICKING to them religiously. If you can’t do it, do nothing because you are then enabling the problem and teaching them to be more secretive. Too many parents are fooled and allow usage 7 days later for “good behavior”. It takes 28 days to break and/or form a habit. Do not kid yourself. Good behavior for a few days is nothing but pure manipulation of the minds. Stop all digital outlets in your home for 28 days THEN evaluate your goals and guidelines from there. Trust me, your child will NOT DIE, even though they will proclaim their demise is approaching! Would you trust an alcoholic to stock a bar a week after AA Meetings? Enough Said.

Bottom line, in today’s society it’s even harder being a parent, but if you want to make a change then start within your own home. Parents can’t guard against everything in life, but you can guard against what your teen is typing, saying and/or being exposed to under your roof. Granted, you may not win any “Popular Parent Awards” right away but one day, your child will thank you for this. You may not only be saving their grades and reputation, but also their lives.

Corie L. Anziano